twelve and counting

Today’s my anniversary. I like this day. You could forget about my birthday every year, and it wouldn’t bother me a bit. Birthday Shmirthday. Today’s my day. I claim it. I’ll share it, sure, but I’ll never give it up. I think that if I could remember the day that I first knew Jesus loved me, then I’d celebrate that, too. And I guess that I could just arbitrarily choose a day as my “Jesus saved me” day, but that’s just weird. Besides, I think I’d rather celebrate that every day, right? But today is different. Yeah, I think about it throughout the year, and it means all sorts of great things to me. But honestly, when February 10th rolls around each year, it’s always special. Today’s my anniversary.

12 years ago today, I drove home with my parents from my last round of chemotherapy. I was greeted with a surprise party from my family. There were balloons, streamers, congratulatory signs, hugs, kisses, and my very first (very beautiful) birthstone ring. That’s pretty spectacular for a 10 year old. It was a neat day.

Every year since then, we’ve celebrated in some way. The five year anniversary was great because the doctors “officially” declared me cured of cancer. There were balloons the size of a car (Thanks, Riskeys!), candies, teddy bears (it’s around Valentine’s Day!), more balloons the size of a car (thanks, Mom and Dad!), a check up at the doctor, and a half day at school. Then I got to go to Bible study and, later, Brent’s house that night. I think I carried the balloons with me all day. What a spectacular time of celebration. For my ten year anniversary, my roommate, Becky, and my then-great-boyfriend (now great husband), John, threw me my very first ever surprise party. Cake, balloons, flowers, gifts, a gathering of friends and family, and good barbecue. I am so blessed.

Anniversaries are strange. Each year marks one more year past, one year more accomplished, one more year away from the event. As time grows between that day and today, I’m kind of sad. It scares me to get further and further away from that time of my life. It defines me in a way that I haven’t quite determined, and I wonder if it will lose meaning as time passes. Well, it could never lose meaning to me. But more and more, I meet people who never knew that part of my life. More and more, I wonder if people see any significance in it. I think I fear that one day, that time will just be a blip on the radar of my life. But it’s so much more than that. It’s this huge thing that I haven’t yet come to terms with. I think it will take the rest of my life to learn how God wants that season to affect the whole of my time here. And I that’s why I fight so hard to celebrate today. Because today’s my anniversary. I like this day. So forget my birthday. Birthday Smirthday. Today’s my day. I claim it. I’ll share it, sure, but I’ll never give it up.